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Monday, 10 March 2014

EXCLUSIVE! Jennifer Lawrence Plans Third & (Hopefully) Final Fall for Oscars 2015

Posted on 08:06 by the great khali
[Disclaimer from The Editor: This is a fiction piece.]

It seems two falls aren't enough for Oscar Award-winning actress, Jennifer Lawrence. Jared Leto has gone on record saying (jokingly?) that she's completely faking it. But now from our sources it appears this is actually true.
 ^(L) Jennifer wows in her orange gown that she fell in at the Academy Awards 2014. (R) She followed that up with this stunning shattered glass dress for the after-party, deciding to go commando.

Apparently the 23-year-old has already got designers from Dior busy. Yes, you read right- Dior. A concept design for the gown has leaked & our reporter jumped right on the scene. From our sources: "Jennifer came to us with this particular concept she had in mind. It was very intriguing & strange at the same time & we, of course, took it up as a challenge. She said, & these are her words exactly, 'I want a stunning dress that's made of a thousand tears & it has to be tight, as tight as it can get- I mean Victorian-tight! I must fall."

We contacted Jennifer's current boyfriend Nicholas Hoult who she met while filming X-Men First Class. He was reluctant to share at first but we managed to coax some tidbits out of him: "I don't know what's up with Jen. I mean, we all know what a goofball she is & stuff, & she can be so crazy at times [laughs]. We've joked so much about her two-time Oscar-falling performances. I often tell her that I thought the only time she'd ever fall was when she fell in love with me. Apparently that's not enough & she just has to end up making a spectacle of herself at the Oscars. I don't know why really...It's definitely not for the attention 'cos she gets like super-embarrassed about it after. Maybe we're over-thinking this & it could just be the tight gowns & 10 inch heels [laughs]!"

Our source at Dior said that the concept below has been shown to Lawrence. She loved the design but only added: "Tighter. I must fall dammit! And it has to be at the Oscars next year or I'll have to start all over again right from Fall #1! I want to end this at three falls." Our source says that they found all this so incredulous but they have chugged on with the concept & made the changes.

The dress has been dubbed as "Tears of Eve". Apparently someone in the design team is Eva & they thought the name just clicked. Previously, the design crew referred to the gown as "Jennifer's tight-as-hell gown" so this was definitely an improvement. Jennifer was insistent that the gown had to be Kingfisher Blue in color. She decided to also get her jewelry pieces custom-made & added the teardrop design to the earrings & necklace as well. Her shoes will also have the tears on them.

But after digging up this entire scoop on the blue-eyed beauty, this reporter had only one question in his mind: Why? Do celebrities these days go through such great lengths to be noticed & written about? Are they really so full of themselves? However these doubts get somewhat cleared when you think about the answer that Jen gave at this year's Oscars when asked about the fall: "I seriously have no friggin idea why people are making such a big deal about this! I mean, Jared was out there laughing right at my face. [laughs] Seriously guys, it's not like I had a wardrobe malfunction or something."

Whatever be the reason Lawrence is going through these shenanigans, one thing is certain: She must fall. And it has to be at the Oscars next year.
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